Not finding a job after college

The past four months for me have been filled with frustration, contentment, and exploration. When I graduated in July, I moved back home when my lease was up. I was determined not to stay here long, and even refused to buy a bed for about a month. But then came the fear. Not the fear of not being able to find a job, but the fear of putting myself out there, having endless possibilities. I was afraid to apply.

I wasn't like a lot of my other classmates who applied for jobs during the school year, so they could start working in the Fall. I just got a summer internship, and didn't want to worry about job hunting until it was over. My internship experience was interesting, but still not an actual paying job.

Now that it is November, I have been feeling like I'm just not good enough and have been wondering why. I have a good resume (in my opinion), I have entry level experience, but I haven't even been called back for a regular office assistant job that you don't even need a degree for. I had brief thoughts of 'why did I go to college anyway?'

However, before this job search, I prayed that the doors that I'm supposed to go through be opened, and the ones I'm not to be closed. Still the process is frustrating when the only jobs that call me for interviews seem like scams. I went to one interview that completely turned me off and avoided similar jobs. (ones that have the same exact description but different names).

That was the frustration...

After that I got way too content. I didn't even start applying to jobs until about September because of fear, and then I got to content with my situation at home. Don't ask me how because Lord knows I want my own space, quickly, so I can get out of here. But, it is easy to get comfortable in your situation.

But, then I got to explore possibilities if people didn't want to hire me. I would make my own dang business. I started writing, determined that I would become the next best seller (which I hope is true), and create my own branding business. I can do it, but that comes with a lot of planning. honestly it seems like my best bet at the moment. So the future....

Anyway, life after college is a journey. I kinda hate it, but I like it as well because I do have a lot of freedom, and no responsibilities at the moment. Honestly its not bad, but constantly getting rejected with no explanation can really wear you down. *sigh*

With love,
Lisa